This morning, my daughter wanted to sword fight with me. She would squeal with happiness, each time she won, when her sword broke through my protective barrier, and I tumbled to the ground...but when the tables were turned-when I was the winner, and it has her turn to be the good sported, defeated one, she screamed and stomped, and decided to quit. Now granted, she's 3 years old...but I felt instantly connected to her in this moment.
I've been struggling with some new challenges in my career path(s)...wondering which way to go, and who am I to really try? I had a path that was working for me, where I was doing well and was successful. Why would I want to go in a direction that would likely show me lots of failure and where I might not "win"? That doesn't sound fun.
It kinda came together a bit for me this morning, when I had a heart-to-heart with Parker about how we don't always win. As a matter of fact, if we did always win, we wouldn't have the same kinds of good feelings that came with a win that we actually worked to get. And the sooner she could understand this, the easier both winning and losing could potentially be for her.
It was a struggle to help her to understand that while it's fun to win, it can also be fun to root for other people to win, and then when you win again yourself knowing it wasn't just given to you, not only will you be able to say you earned it, but you'll likely have other people alongside you, that you've been encouraging too, that are there to encourage you right back. Then everybody wins, even when you don't always "win".
After a few moments to herself to think things over, she came back to me and said she was ready to sword fight again. This time, she would be okay with losing. And so she did, and she was.
But then after she lost more than once, it was too painful for her again-so she quit, again. I gave her space and yet comforted her, letting her make that choice for herself, and letting her know I was there when she was ready to try again. I told her I knew losing wasn't always fun, but that it would be alright. And then she came back again, and we both had our share of wins and losses, and lots of laughs and hugs. It got better. It keeps getting easier for her to lose, but the wins feel sweeter too, because she knows I'm not just letting her win.
I tell you all of this because, as a visual artist, one thing I miss(ed) the most about being in art school, working alongside other creatives is the camaraderie of the other students and professors. We shared our progress with one another. We shared our ideas and offered feedback. Sometimes we didn't like what the other people said, and sometimes we decided they were wrong (and sometimes they were, and that's okay). But sometimes we knew they were right, and we'd sit with it, and decide to grow through their input. I've wanted more of this in my life, again. And thanks to the artists at REsolve Studios, I've found the space to explore like this, once again.
If you'd like some of this, too-if you're working on a project, a piece of art, an idea, and would like a place to get input from a variety of other creatives, join us for our first meeting on Saturday, September 12th, from 6:30-8:30pm, in Marietta, OH. It's only 10.00 to attend, and you can pay in advance, here:
Just add the photo to your shopping cart and purchase a spot for the meeting.
Also, we'll be meeting up at a local restaurant around 5pm that same night, to get the good vibes going so we can hit the ground running at the meeting. Details upon registration.
Please join us. We'd love to see you, there.